I was cleared to begin clinicals today and find myself both excited and nervous about functioning in a new role, that of somewhat trained paramedic. (note the use of a small p) I find myself at the point where I have to carefully follow the skill sheets and protocols, this is a new experience for me because I had become very accustomed to taking shortcuts and skipping steps because I knew what I was doing as an EMT. I assumed that because I was a competent EMT, I would then become a competent paramedic. It doesn't work that way. I find myself struggling with going back to rigid adherence to skill sheets and protocols, I don't like it but find that I have to take a step backward in order to take many more steps forward.
I find myself chuckling at the last post I wrote to this blog because I find after reading the comment that was posted and the article it referred to that my feelings were more of not realizing that I had to drop back to the novice class and swallow my pride, but thanks to The EMT Spot, I at least now have a better understanding of what is occurring.
The skills are becoming easier but up until now have been either practiced on mannakins or my classmates so the stress level was much lower than it will be with the real patients in the clinical site. I asked you to note the small p remember? When I look at how far I have come it seems like such a short distance when compared to how far I still have to go but the distance is being eaten at an incredible rate. I look forward to the day that I am sure enough of both my skills and my knowledge so that I can call myself a Paramedic and not a Student Paramedic; but realize that in some ways that day will come soon, in other ways it feels like it may take much longer that it seems today.